Thursday, August 30, 2012

For My Merdeka Wish...I Wish....


You think I'm joking? I'm pretty serious you know...

Okay, maybe not literally...sheesh...

Ripped from IIUM.FM
Now, back to the topic...
Yes, deep down inside me, I wish that Malaysia would be destroyed....
Or put into chaos...
Or had a zombie apocalypse...
Or an alien invasion...
Anything, as long that it just...well destroyed...

Before you could show me your t-.-t and cursing...let me clarify...


So, why fiction?
You see, fiction existed to deliver a message to society in a subtle yet entertaining way. The reason I wish that Malaysia to be fiction is to instill gratefulness into the Malaysian's heart.

You see, people take Malaysia for granted. It's own inhabitant didn't appreciate Malaysia. They condemn Malaysia. They don't want to serve Malaysia. Furthermore, Malaysia become a subject of comparison with the OTHER countries which they deemed to be far better than Malaysia...

Not only that, Malaysian; the people of Malaysia fought with each other. Invisible barriers segregate us once more after all those hard work to bring those barriers down during the Fight for Independence, yet WE the citizen of Malaysia erect those barriers once again without shame.

A superficial analysis filled with over generalization?

And take a look around you...

The current generation, the leaders of tomorrow are even more segregated than before. The 'Race Spirit' fill theirs hearts as they become pretentious and egoistic; deeming the other 'races' as inferior. Not only that, we also have 'ideologies' which we seek not to understand and tolerate but to condemn and obstinate. I tried to be as open and have the "Malaysian Mindset" but sadly, I was among the minorities. Most of the times, I would get statements such as "Melayu lupa diri" for having this mindset.

It's a big irony. The 1Malaysia slogan was launched a couple years ago and in my opinion, it doesn't strengthen our unity but it actually make us more aware of our 'race'. Ever since the launching of that slogan, I never once met someone who can say "We are 1Malaysia" with genuine sincerity and without any trace of sarcasm. (IN MY OBSERVATION, MIND YOU)

Why are we, Malaysians doing this? It's sad to see us becoming more and more disunited; fighting everyday, condemning each other. People left Malaysia in pursuit of money and refuse to contribute back to the country. It's sad...We really took our peace, our independence, and our Malaysia for granted...

And that's why...

If any of you filmmakers, writers, directors or any people of art...
Please, I beg you...
Put Malaysia into chaos in your works...
Imagining the worst case scenario as our country burn into ashes and put it into art...
And showcase it around Malaysia...
Enough with the 'gangster' and 'hantu' and 'bohsia' and 'cinta'
Us, Malaysians give an EF already...

Make us a meaningful movie...of how everything falls apart in Malaysia
Let us feel the sadness and realism of watching our own country....our Malaysia, fall...
Then we can truly appreciate Malaysia more...
And you, people of arts, will be truly respected...
As the one who woke Malaysian up from their daydream...

Now, the question is...

Stand up people of art...
And do your job!

PS: Happy Merdeka!

Note: This post is only my opinion. Discussions are possible in the comment section below. :)

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Reality of Post Examinations


I just knew my ADP examination results this morning and my first reaction was:

"What the ef? Why?!! WHY??!! WHY?!!"

Then I go,

"It's all my fault! Why I didn't study? Why didn't I play games? Why did I watch anime? Why did I call her almost everyday? Why/????

Then it was like...

"Meh, screw this..."

And then...

"Wow, it was not that bad..."

And finally,

"Woohoo! My results are awesome!!!"

Now, can you see my different reaction as time goes by? Psychologist may find this similar to the "Circle of Acceptance" or something. I don't know. I can't remember the exact term.

You see, obtaining one's result can be both sad or happy occasion...well mostly because of the results itself. But there how we react is actually conditional and heavily depend on our perspective of the results itself.

Read back my responses above. At first, I was so frustrated as if the world would end because I didn't achieved my desirable results but at the end, I was jumping in joy of my results as if it exceeds my dream score by a mile.

I'm sure all of you had taken exams before. Have you ever feel jealous of your classmates who scored better than you? All those regrets you thought about and did which you think affect your score. But the weird thing is, they're completely unsatisfied with their awesome results. Now, you compare yourself with someone with a lower score than you. Your heart jumped in joy as the feeling of superiority fills your psyche. The weird thing is, they're much happier with their score than you with yours.

Now do you catch my drift?

How we respond to our results are heavily dependent on our perspectives and views on the said results.

What about perspective?
You see, the reason the top students felt unhappy is because the result didn't gave them satisfaction. It was lower than their expected scores, of course they are unhappy. Same goes to the lower scoring students. They were happy because their score was better than their expected scores.

Sure, I'm expecting highly of my grades and I felt unhappy for not achieving my desirable results. But why did I became so happy? It's because I change my perspective of it.

What did I change in my perspective?
To put it simply, I began to reflect on my other activities. What did I do aside from studying? To tell the truth, I did a lot of things aside for studying during college. I read, write, play, socialize, enter clubs, explore the world, debate, observe, research, help, and so on. I did A LOT OF THINGS.

Then I rationalize...
I sacrifice my grades to do all of these things. It's a fair trade don't you think? I sacrifice my grades to gain knowledge on another subject called LIFE.

No, I'm not implying that you should sacrifice your whole study to learn about LIFE or every top scorer doesn't have a life but I want you to think. Rather than being overly depressed about the results you DON'T get, why not be happy about the other achievements you DID make.

Not every people are inclined academically. That's what I learnt from my brothers. So don't be sad about your exam scores. Think further and further! Life is not just a number like a test score.

However, if you didn't achieve anything or learn anything from life, then it's a huge problem for you. GO AND DO SOMETHING LAH!

PS: My exam results are not that bad. It's just I'm pressure by those other 4 flat bankies around me...Yes, I'm a KIASU
PSS: I got 3.89 for the sem FYI
PSSS: Okay fine, call me ungrateful brat...sheesh, I'm just trying to make a point and reflect on a pressing topic
PSSSS: I like food

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Daunting? Of course...Impossible? Heck no


What I feared the most recently is my personal statement for my college application
I believe my SAT scores can be pushed to the 2000 tier with a bit of work, but as for the personal statement, much needed to be done.

Seriously, I find this task daunting for me. Why? It's because I need to dig deeper into myself...
The problem is...
I have too many stuff to talk about!

Yes, the problem of a self-proclaimed philosopher such as myself is that we did too much self reflection that we knew ourselves too much. Ironically, we knew ourselves too much until we don't know who are we in the first place.

So, that's my problem...
Which part of the spectrum should I represent?
Which personality should I take?
Which mask should I wear?

Man, this is hard...but it's far from impossible

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Romance- The Best Catalyst?


So let's talk about romance
No, don't talk about the joys of a relationship
Let's talk about the effects of it...

I lived in Malaysia, where relationships among students in often being stereotyped as THE FALL OF EVERY SINGLE STUDENT KNOW TO MAN

Okay, that's over exaggeration but really, if you are a student AND in a relationship, you will be labeled as:


And so on so forth...

But is reality that true?

Everyone knows that there are many different kinds of romantic relationships. There are relationship which are superficial and fake; relationships which are materialistic; relationship which are purely sexual; relationship which are abusive; relationship which are mutual etc

The thing is; students, especially teenage students; are a bunch of immature people. Not to insult anyone but it's reality. Driven by hormones and emotions, teenagers are an unstable bunch. Put two of these kinds of the opposite sex together and you have a pretty much and unstable relationship.

Why unstable?
Because this kind of relationship are often short sighted
Only to seek the thrill of an 'I love you'
That's why it fails
And consequently affect everything like your studies and other social responsiblities
And thus, the stereotype was born.

But again, there was an exception
What if, you can see the future?
The future where you and him/her are together?
And envision it together?
Immediately, all your actions will be strokes to paint the picture that you envisioned.
Thus, a stable and long lasting relationship is formed...

That's why, think about marriage first before the actually relationship.
The quote "Think with the end in mind" applies to relationships too.

I've seen many students in a relationship who strive and become a very successful student. Among scholars, there are people who are in a relationship. And most of them, when interviewed, admit that they had a vision where they finally get married to their significant other and use that as a catalyst to drive them forward even more. They study so they could succeed. Be a good husband. Be a good wife. Be a good father. Be a good mother. That is their goal, and they work for it!

Thus, the relationship works...
But it's a mutual thing...
One can't done in alone...
Both sides must work together...
It's a relationship right?

Why such confidence with that statement?
Because I'm one of them...

EDIT: Since people are getting butthurt for no reason, the above statement refers to the "Using romance as a catalyst" part...not the freaking "Confirm get married to the one"...Haiz perception...

Either way, it shows how addicted we are with the topic of marriage

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

A Man's Tear

A man doesn't simple shed a tear
Because a man is a man
Tears are a sign of weakness; a sign of him losing the very essence of his manliness.

I heard one saying that says:

A man's tears are like diamonds
It withstand enormous pressure before actually letting it out

When a man cries, most of us will saying like "What are you a sissy?" or  "Crying? Come on, you are a man"

But do you KNOW the reason behind those tears?

As mentioned earlier, a man cries when he is at his lowest; pressured from every direction, in pain yet helpless. He, being a man, won't be intimidated by small challenges, by when challenges that are far too big for him to handled was given to him, he will cry...and shed a tear...

Why am I writing about a man's tear?

Because I shed one...

And I witness the strongest man I knew...
A man who withstood countless challenges
A man who knew the bottom of the social pyramid at the back of his hands
A man who once faced poverty and jumped right back up

That man shed a tear...
That man shed TEARS
A testament to the pressure he faced...

Maybe you are wondering


One word:


Yes, family
That is an any man's weakness and strength
It will make or brake any man alive

See history
See literature
See the people around you 

Ask any successful man alive, what drives them?
Ask any broken man, what broke them?

FAMILY will make a man shed tears...
When he does...
that shows how important FAMILY for him

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Why I took Public Transport

Who the heck took the LRT to work?
I'm frickin' 18
You know that means?
I have a fricking driver's license
But too bad though, I DON'T HAVE A FRICKIN' CAR!
So what are my options, as someone who traveled a lot?


Every single Malaysian knows that the Malaysia's public transport are absolutely depressing though improving bit by bit.
Malaysian opt more to take their own vehicle to travel around because logically, it's more efficient.


After all these years of taking the public transport, I found that it's better for myself to take the public transport rather than driving around myself simply because I CAN DEVELOP MYSELF MORE

Self development?
What the heaven (hell is too mainstream) are you talking about? Makes no logical sense.

Well dear readers,
Life was never logical
And will never be.

You see, I find myself more productive when taking the public transport. And yes, I'm gonna rant again about my productivity levels again and again and again.

When I took public transport, I find myself thinking more and more. My brain will start to wandering around my subconscious, searching and synthesizing ideas while I wait for the freaking KTM to finally arrive after delaying for the 10th time.

I realized that most of the ideas from ReGenesis was founded when I was drooling in the bus
I realized that most of my social observation have been done in the LRT
I realized that most of my practice time from small talk was from riding a taxi
I realized that if I took public transport, I swear less and less. (Seriously, when I drive, I 5 languages alot)

Yesterday, I took a bus from Sunway to KL
And there was this foreigner sitting next to me.
He asked me about the direction to KLCC which I replied expertly due to my knowledge with public transport.
Then we started talking...
I found out that...
-He was an ex-Libyan Liberation Front member
-He is a black belt in Aikido
-He once got shot by a sniper
-He once killed a man
-He has a Masters in Civil Engineering
-He is a fricking eligible Muslim
-He has a 600++ books in his library
-He has a 4 TB worth of documentary

See? I met such an interesting person in THE BUS
And he is not the only one
I met and talked with ex-bohsia, ex-army, a professor, a blindman, a cancer patient all in the public transport
It, ultimately, helped me to discover more and more

Be adventurous
Be brave
Be open minded
And take the public transport

Who knows,
You might be the next Densha Otoko
And meet the love of your life in a LRT

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Something about Teachers

Le random picture appears!

Love them, hate them
They still teach us (U DONT SAY?)

But you see, what do they taught us?
Of course
It's in their job description to teach subjects according to their expertise
But is that all?

Today, I went back to my Alma Mater
Yes, the same school that broke my soul hundreds of times...and build it back thousands of times.
Why? To settled my recommendation letters for CommonApp
From who? TEACHERS

*Cue epic shiver of fear*
Ever since my stint at 17th February 2012, I have this trauma toward teachers. I felt that they'll always judging you, fixing you from the depths of their minds and oppress you. I grew really afraid of them and maintain my distance from them in school.
Seriously, I was far from a teacher's pet.

10 months after graduation and here I am, back in SMSS
Hoping for those people called teachers to actually write something good and nice about me; a stubborn rebel of the student body. The thought of it make me sick. I keep away from them and now I need to ask favors from THEM? It's like licking their shoes or something.

My pride cried...but it's for the best.

So upon reaching the school, I saw my Form 5 Chemistry teacher coming out from the hall. He is a very nice guy and very approachable. So, I called and greeted him.
Our warm greeting were exchanged and he asked me.

T: "Where are you studying now?"
Me: "Taylor's University, doing ADP, you know, preparation to the US"
T: "Wow! That's great. Congratulations boy! So what brings you here?"
Me: "Er...actually need to settle my teachers recommendation letters for my university application...I'm kinda afraid becau-"
T: "Oh really? Do you want me to write you a recommendation letter?"
Me: *shocked* "Really sir?"
T: Sure sure *smiles*
Me: Then can you be my counsellor?
T: Of course!
Me: *surprised* Er...thanks sir. Thank you very much...
T: You are my student. I always help my student. It's my job

You are my student. I always help my student. It's my job
You are my student. I always help my student. It's my job
You are my student. I always help my student. It's my job

Oh, how I wish I could cry at that time.
Obviously, I was shocked.
I didn't realized that teachers are THAT kind
All this time, I thought I'm not worthy of their kindness and such
And I should maintain my distance because I am a BAD STUDENT

But then...
He said that kind words and volunteered to help me without any hesitation...

Surprise was an understatement at that time.

And it doesn't stop there.

The moment I stepped in the staffroom, I've been greeted by the teachers with such warmth which was alien for me. I even wondered, is this really Sains Selangor?

These are among the actual (translated) quotes from the teachers in the staffroom

"Nazran, congratulation to your batch."
"Your batch did very well after graduating"
"I miss those 5 Usaha guys, they were naughty, sure...but they were full of enthusiasm...I can't find it in this year's batch."
"Genesis eh? Very havoc and chaotic batch...but they're still very polished product of SMSS"
"Us teachers actually miss your batch. We were actually waiting for you to visit us."

Inside, I was tearing up...
I can't believe they actually miss us.
Genesis aka the worst batch of SMSS
They, the teachers misses US

I feel really bad right now.
How can I be so ignorant toward their kind and love?
They didn't care about my blog already
They don't give a damn in fact
They, now are very proud of me....
Very proud of the whole Genesis

But what did we do for them?
What did we do for the school?

Then I left...
With a totally new paradigm...
Teachers...are not devils or such
They are just like your parents, as cliche'd as it sounds...its the hard truth

I'm sorry for judging you, teachers

Saturday, August 11, 2012

Trip Down the Memory Lane

Memories are meant to be cherish

As cliche'd as it sounds, we all can agree that memories are treasures; something that is precious and valuable to an individual. How could you not cherish memories?

The time you cried in a department store
The time you pee in your pants due to fright from a horror movie
The time you first went to school
The time you made your first friend
The time you first did an exam
The time you first had a girlfriend
The time you cried during the last day of school

All of these are memories; no matter how happy or sad it is.
Memories are special
It doesn't exist physically as in something that can be viewed and felt like a four dimensional video.
It exists merely as a group of neurons sequence in the deepest parts of our brains.
However, we associate physical objects to that certain memories in order for our brains to achieve a jolt to squander for the memory that resides deep in our brain.

That physical object is often called: Memento

And that's the topic of today

Today, I did a huge spring cleaning of my room. And believe me, 


As tedious as it was, I find something enjoyable about spring cleaning; that is the treasure hunt behind it.

My room is full of memento. I make it a habit to collect objects that associate with a certain memory so I could recall it and feel nostalgic.

This year is the first year I'm not a SMSS student

Such a mistake because MOST of my memento are form SMSS

Among the stuff I found:

  • My English Journal when I was in Form Three
  • A love poem dedicated to 'her' from 2010 (Strawberry and Mint was the title, gonna post it later)
  • A box full of notes
  • My SPM trial papers
  • My old MP3 from 2007
  • F1 Pamphlets from 2010 and 2011
  • Keychains from Singapore and Langkawi
  • Name tags...from all kinds...and names
All of these Genesis T-shirt...I'm giving it away for free...Any takers?

KTJ Official Pamphlet...So thick I tell you

My collection of PS2 games...waaa I wish I could play them all again T_T

My best friend. He help me discovered life while having fun. Died last year. RIP good friend T_T

The untouched

Proposal of SMSS Student Council...signed by the Principal...but never seen the light of the day

Tags from F1, Band, MSLS, Eduquest and Flash mob!

Tons of trinkets...serious...

When I'm browsing through all of these memento, I nearly cried...
All the good and bad times...
Every single one of them...
Is the reason why I'm here today.
It shaped me...indirectly or directly
And without one of them, I would be a different person...
It's my motivation...
To make more and more memories
And collect more and more memento

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

The Modern Slacker

I found an interesting article on Star Online today...Something to be pondered upon